The new Cambridge SELTA
That is “Survival in English Language Teaching for Adults”, the forthcoming shorter, easier course that is designed to compete with the cheaper courses offered by online TEFL course providers etc. Here is the provisional syllabus, published so that Cambridge can get your input before the final announcement is made:
- 20 ways to say “That’s an interesting question, let me get back to you in the next lesson”
- The 20 best activities for filling class time
- How to use one song, video or worksheet in all your classes all week
- 15 ways to get other teachers in your school or on the Net to plan your lessons for you
- How neatness and niceness can make up for a lack of teaching skills
- Hangman and four other games your kids’ classes will never tire of
- How to make your students like you
- Padding your CV
- How to stay awake in Business English classes, one to ones with housewives and IELTS exam practice
- What to say to teachers who think people like you are bringing the “profession” into disrepute
- The only three photocopiable books you will ever need to look at
- How to avoid the very worst schools
- Escaping jobs when your boss has your passport and has pushed you into so much debt by not paying you on time that you can’t afford to fly home
- Your suggestion here
Tags: News
May 17th, 2009 at 9:22 am
ha ha, like it. very funny – unfortunately it is close to being true!
May 17th, 2009 at 12:46 pm
Heya, Alex
Been a while since I visited (Bad, Leslie! Bad!). Hope things are going well. You still in Japan?
Cute post, man. Here’s a few more ideas I rattled off while knocking down a cold brewski this Sunday evening:
– How to cultivate your charm so that nothing else matters
– The 5 best responses for “Teacher, me level up”
– Top tips for avoiding the gone-native DoS
– 7 crackerjack strategies for shoebox living, one-pot cooking, and general transience
– The Zen of living with cockroaches, millipedes, and other assorted vermin
– Stodgy, “just-enough-rope”-style half-truths for teaching a plethora of grammar points
– a short, “get-ready” primer on kids sleeping through your classes… and still passing!
– Drinking Games 101 (refresher)
– a HANDFUL of anti-grope maneouvres
– Sleeping with your adult students: The Basics
– How to make like you know what you’re doing when your DoS assigns you to an exam class for the first time, 2 months into the job
– Weighing up the pros and cons of accepting a DoS job when in an exotic location with just 6 months’ experience under your belt
– 4 timeless ways to cope with rich kiddies who’ve been sent abroad by their folks
– the quickest and easiest way to convincingly bullshit your students on some grammar or vocab point rather than saying “I don’t know; let me check and get back to you”
– how to play one classic song on guitar, which you can then whip out every Staff-Appraisal Day so they luvs ya
– How to un-detect blatant plaigarism and keep your job
– cultivating an authoratative standpoint and accompanying tone of voice on a wide range of teaching points despite having little or no experience
– simple strategies for loudly and frequently Walter-Mittying your experiences in [name of previous shithole] at your subsequent places of employment so as to make it sound like you’ve sure lived the wild life, baby
May 17th, 2009 at 12:50 pm
Okay, I’m a dumbarse. I see (from the header on the site!) that you’re now in Korea.
Hope it’s treating you well and that you’re dealing with all the treading on kibun you’re no doubt doing! Ha ha! ;-P
May 17th, 2009 at 5:12 pm
Tony’s right! Even worse, I was planning a blog posting on this very subject soon … so thanks for providing more flesh for me to pick off the bone, it’s very useful, Alex.
Actually, I would add ‘Teaching card games to your students’, as it’s a very good way to top up your salary, plus a few simplified chat-up lines for getting your fill of ‘extra-curricular activities’!
May 18th, 2009 at 8:30 am
- How to photocopy gap fill exercises five minutes before the lesson starts.
- How to teach when hung over.