Archive for the ‘Japanese natural disasters’ Category

You might have some idea, as most people in England do, that the pay in Japan is quite good. Even so, you might be surprised to hear that I recently moved into a mansion- until you realise that ‘manshon’ in Japanese (or Japanese English) doesn’t mean a stately home with extensive grounds, but just an apartment building made out of concrete. I know, I laughed at this use of the word mansion too, until I slowly began to realise all the implications of living in part of a simple wooden two-storey ‘apaato’ (often known by teachers as ‘portacabins’ or ‘trailer homes’). So, here’s the low-down for those that want it about accommodation in Japan…

So, why all the fuss about the building material of my new place and the ridiculously fancy name? Well, I don’t know about log cabins in the Rockies, but having concrete in Tokyo means you don’t have to put up with any of the following complaints about typical suburban teacher’s wooden apaato:
-Being able to hear everything your neighbours do (from snoring and pulling the toilet chain, to simply sighing or stacking their dishes in the cupboard)
-Having your building shake not just from the earthquakes (that happens everywhere), but from passing trucks, trains, cars warming their engines up downstairs, people walking too heavily along the walkway etc. etc.
-Having a flat that is colder than outside in winter and hotter than outside in summer. If you don’t want to spend a fortune on electricity (and my monthly bills were the same as a family of four in the UK), in the winter you have to live under your duvet- often with several jumpers, a hat and gloves on underneath, and in the summer you have to put your work shirt on outside your front door, so it doesn’t instantly get covered in sweat.
-Having to sort my rubbish into 5 different bags- burnable, unburnable, plastic packaging, paper and ‘dangerous’
-Cockroaches (I didn’t have any of this typical problem, but I got smelly drains that had to be drained every two weeks or so)
-Death by earthquake. Obviously, I didn’t suffer from this one either, but in the most recent biggish ones near Niigata all the new buildings stayed up, and most of the owners of old buildings are still living in tents as the snows approach

Instead of all that, now that I’ve found a ‘mansion’ of my own (actually, now that my Japanese girlfriend has found us a place of our own) I’m saved all that and finally feel like I’m living in the first world country that I see around me. The flat only costs about a quarter of an average teacher’s wages, and it comes with lots of totally unnecessary electronic nonsense, such as a radio with 800 channels and a remote control for the lights- so now I really feel like I live in the land of gadgets. You’ll be overjoyed to hear that my life is just perfect, and want to come rushing out to teach and live in Kawasaki too, but there are just two small problems- one, that my flat is very very small indeed and two, they probably wouldn’t rent it to you anyway…

I really don’t mind the size of this flat, but then, I’m only five foot eight and like a simple life. And, luckily, Japanese life is completely designed for this kind of living- everything you can buy for your tiny flat is tiny too. Shops are full of miniature washing machines (upright like a 1970s one in the UK, so it can hide in a tiny closet), towels, bottles of washing up liquid, ironing boards, baths, bath mats, hi-fis, walkmans (often mini-disc), some cans of beer, baths, condoms, futons, pillows, backpacks, rolls of sellotape, DVD boxes … The only exception is the huge dispensers of shampoo, ‘rinse’ (conditioner) and ‘body shampoo’ (shower gel), but that just helps them balance on the edge of the bath better- which is the only place you are likely to find to put them. After a while, it all seems to make sense. In fact, the Japanese love of reducing things in size is pure practicality given the limited amount of space they get in their homes and on the train coming home. In fact that, and their quest for convenience, explains the design of just about every successful Japanese product- the latest one being a VAIO desktop computer with a fold up keyboard. That would certainly save me bashing my head every time I get out of ‘bed’! Anyway, injuries aside I love all this little stuff, but you might want to think twice about coming to Japan if you are rugby-player-size. If not, you should be okay, if…

… they will actually rent a flat to you in the first place. Not only do landlords take up to 7 months rent off you when you move in, up to half of which is non-refundable ‘key-money’ (the Japanese term translates as ‘thank you money’, cheeky gits), they also demand that you have a guarantor or two. Sounds like some kind of hangover from feudalism to me- although there isn’t, as far as I know, the need to let the landlord sleep with each new bride or to send your children to work in their fields. Luckily, you might never have to worry about that anyway, because like the majority of Japanese ryokan and minshuku (bed and breakfasts), Japanese onsen (hot spring baths), Japanese hotels (at home and abroad) and Japanese hostess bars, most Japanese apartments have an unspoken ‘no foreigners’ rule- so you’ll be needing to look for a ‘foreigner friendly’ place to stay. How is such racism (or at least nationalism) possible in the modern world? No idea, but actually experiencing discrimination for the first time in my life as a white, middle-class male has been a very educational experience- as has my whole time in Japan so far (4 years). And despite the very small towels, I must say I still find every day interesting, always different, and instructive in what endless possibilities there are in life- and that is all I ask for…
Postscript- This is actually a recycled email I sent when I moved into my last “mansion”, but I still reckon most of it is true and I’ve mainly just changed the dates. Sorry about all the recycled stuff recently (if you’ve noticed), but been very busy writing not one but two stories for the EL Gazette, of which you will get an exclusive preview here even before the article is published there. Coming soon to a TEFLtastic blog near you…

Very funny piece from the Onion (always worth reading to remind yourself that not all American comedy is the remake of the Office) on Japan:

http://www.theonion.com/content/news/earthquake_sets_japan_back_to_2147

The weird thing is that some people in the USA must really have that picture of Japan being the future. You can see my take on that idea here:

http://www.tefl.net/alexcase/archives/257

Why do the Japanese get into a big flap about every “typhoon” that just blows the roof off a couple of sheds?

First of all, don’t make the mistake of confusing the Japanese people and the Japanese media. Just because the news programmes try to outdo each other with details of the disaster doesn’t mean ordinary people are obsessing on it just as much, it is mainly a sign of the news crews’ gambarimasu (I will do my best) mentality and yet another quiet news day in Japan (if you ignore the news from the rest of the world, that is…). Due to not wanting to step on anyone’s toes covering something controvertial, they do tend to swarm all over trivial stories like this.

There are reasons for Japanese people to worry about every storm and not do the English stiff upper lip “oh, it’s just a puff of wind” thing. For one thing, when nature strikes in Japan, be in volcanoes, earthquakes, storms or tsunamis, it really does strike. For another, they are quite risk adverse. And my latest theory is that it is one of the few socially acceptable times in Japan when you can go home early.