The Alternative ELT jargon dictionary- Chomsky-rich special edition
ALR- ape language research-looking into whether it is possible to teach English to West Ham or Birmingham City fans
Chomsky hierarchy (the) - Noam’s at the top, and whoever agrees with him most is in 2nd place
critical period- when you’ve taught students enough language for them to be able to complain about not learning more
deep structure- a classroom grammatical explanation that makes students reconsider the meaning of life
discrete infinity- a black hole that attends a house party without almost anyone noticing
ergative- speech filled with ums and ers
evolutionary linguistics- the idea that humans will evolve to the point where linguists are capable of producing truly scientific theories
extended standard theory (the)- a 12 inch remix of a Noam Chomsky lecture by Tall Paul
FOXP2- phrases kids have learnt from the second season of the Simpsons
homesign- the non-verbal signals that mean you are about to be invited back to her place
language acquisition device- language school euphemism for a credit card
language-maven- (v) the past participle of “language mive”
McGurk effect (the)- the linguistic name for the retching sound people make they first time they try to finish a large Ronald’s meal
non-verbal communication- sentences by students who refuse to use am/is/are
noun declension- The release of tension when you decide to give learning the different cases in German, Greek etc.
Old High German- as spoken by aging hippies in Hamburg
P-marker- Noam Chomsky’s rapper name, used when he hangs out with his posse
poverty of stimulus- Chomsky’s description of trying to teach with the textbook Language to Go
pre-linguistic- not yet knowing that you’ll have to take an MA to get a decent TEFL job
prepositional complement- flattering your good looking students without looking too unprofessional by using unfinished sentences finishing with prepositions, “You are very dressed up tonight, I’d don’t suppose you’d like to…” or “My dream is to enter a club on the arm of a beautiful woman, someone like…”
reflective teacher- one who is taking mirroring of body language too far
revised extended standard theory (the)- the idea that ELT publishers can best serve their customers by releasing a New Headway New Edition with lots of expensive extras that will all have to be thrown away in two years when Brand Spanking New Headway Shiny Edition comes out
surface structure- a quick skimming over a grammatical explanation in class, moving onto the speaking exercise quickly before the students spot the exceptions
Sylvian fissure- a long groove in each hemisphere of the cortex that is needed for normally acquired language and to realise that the 80s band and their lead singer are crap
syntactic nut- someone whose enthusiasm for Chomsky has driven them insane
teacher as facilitator- seeing the role of an educator as providing oversimplifications and endless meaningless encouraging noises
transformation- the evangelical zeal that comes over some people when they convert to Chomskianism
vocal tract position- a less stubborn version of a “vocal intractable position”
Tags: ELT jargon, Humour